A Plan Which None Can Escape
by TheNameIsErronBlack
Summary: Honey Lemon knows she can tell Tadashi that GoGo has a blatantly obvious crush on him, and vice versa, but where would the fun be in such simplicity? Tomadashi/GoGodashi


Honey Lemon was a rather perceptive person. While she was more than reasonably successful in her scientific pursuits, she was also extremely in-tune with human emotion and could easily empathize with those around her. In fact, on more than one occasion, she considered the possibility of a career in the realm of psychology which ultimately never manifested into anything beyond one semester long course entitled Intro to Psychology. (Which she got an A in, obviously) So she was hardly surprised when both Tadashi and GoGo confessed to her that each liked the other. Their relationship was defined by stolen glances, snarky exchanges that devolved into awkward fumbling, and a metric ton of blushing. Oh, the blushing. All it took was a slight brush of the hand or a mutual reach for an object and their faces would burn like Christmas ornaments. It was downright precious. The only problem that each, for distinct reasons, refused to make a move, obviously too petrified by insecurity and shyness to leap into the unknown. Tadashi was a gentleman among gentlemen and GoGo was about as level-headed and rational as a villain of a scary movie with an ear infection when it came to her crush. After they both confessed to her in the most delicate of circumstances of their blatant affection, Honey Lemon believed that was her signal to take matter into her own hands.

"Why are we here, again?"

"We are here, my apprentice, to help you prepare for when you pop the question to GoGo." Being the great friend she was, Honey Lemon vowed to help Tadashi muster the courage to ask out the woman of his dreams.

"We're not getting married."

She simply smiled in response. "If you say so," She found this a bit strange. The entire time she had known Tadashi, he was effortlessly confident and collected in more or less every instance. Sure, she knew that he turned into a lost puppy around GoGo, but it was still somewhat jarring to see him so nervous and despondent. It was kind of amusing, in a way, especially when she considered how fond GoGo was of him. If only he knew. "In any case, I am your friend, and I am bound by the rules of friendship to help you."

Tadashi ran his hands over his face and gave her a look of desperation. "I appreciate that, I really do, but I doubt there's anything on the planet that can motivate me to do what you're asking unless you have a gun you're going to place at my back."

Normally, Honey Lemon would say at this point that she had her work cut out for her, but her amazing planning skills all but assured victory. All that was required was a bit of careful timing. "Well, let's not get to that just yet. How about we start off with something easy? What's one thing you like about her? It could be anything."

That question alone was enough to make Tadashi's cheeks flush and force him to rub the back of his neck sheepishly. Honey Lemon couldn't help but smile. If that single question was enough to get that much of a reaction out of Tadashi, she could only imagine what the next few minutes would entail. The two might lose consciousness due to the amount of embarrassment. "Well, this might sound a bit strange, but…" Tadashi brought his fingers together and began a thorough examination of the floor. "I guess I like her...hair."

"Her hair?"

Tadashi responded like a child being interrogated by an indignant professor. "Yeah. It looks nice."

"There's nothing wrong with that," Honey Lemon knew that Tadashi needed encouragement instead of derision, and there was no denying that GoGo had _great_ hair. "That's a good start. Now, as an exercise, let's pretend you're writing a poem about her hair."

"What?"

"Pretend we're in English class and you have been assigned to write a poem about her great hair." She concluded without a modicum of irony.

Tadashi rubbed his hand on his chin and contemplated the thought for several seconds. "Uh, Leiko, your hair is like," He paused for a moment and glanced out a window for inspiration. "A purple haze of radiant beauty like that of the stars of the night sky."

Despite her intense willpower, Honey Lemon couldn't stop herself from bursting into a small fit of laughter. There was something perversely amusing the way GoGo was able to turn Tadashi from confident to painfully shy without even being present and vice versa. He looked away in embarrassment. "No! I'm not laughing at you, in fact, I think we're making great progress!" She checked the time with her peripheral vision. The hour of judgement approached. "So, we're going to take it to the next level. I'm going to pretend to be Leiko and you're going to pretend to ask me out."

Tadashi looked as if a gun had been placed in his face. "You can't be serious."

"Absolutely. It's the only way you're going to be truly ready, my student." Honey Lemon got into character by sitting down, placing her legs on an adjacent chair, and making several obnoxiously loud chewing sounds. Her acting skills were truly impeccable. "You got something to say to me, Hamada? Spit it out."

Tadashi's eyebrows shot up upon hearing Honey Lemon's disgustingly inaccurate impression of their mutual friend's voice. "Aiko, you can't be seri-"

"Uh, you're talking to Leiko, dumb-dumb. If you're gonna spill your feelings and admit you love me, you better make if fast." She snapped her fingers twice to hustle him along.

Tadashi ultimately conceded to Honey Lemon's plan as he shuffled his hands together to psych himself into it. Luckily, he was far too focused on forming a coherent sentence to notice the entrance of a certain someone who was also presently too flabbergasted to speak.

" _Right on time."_ Honey Lemon's plan was going off without even the smallest divergence.

"Leiko, I know I'm about to embarrass myself here and destroy our friendship, but I need you to know something: I think you are the most wonderful person in the world. You're...funny, sweet, smart, beautiful, and I absolutely treasure every second I get to spend with you," Whatever remnants of the shyness that plagued him before were gone as he took on an air of seriousness that Honey Lemon very rarely saw in him. "And I know people say that I'm too young or this is just an infatuation or a crush, but whenever I need to motivate myself, I just have to remember that tomorrow is another day I get to spend with you. Even when I'm dreading the challenges of life, I just think of how you make me feel and all these butterflies that invade my stomach whenever you walk into a room, and suddenly I feel like I can take on the whole universe. Just talking to you or being near you...it makes me feel...giddy," His confidence wavered as he shut his eyes to focus. "Sometimes your sarcasm and your wit and all your little proclivities are just so charming and adorable that I just want to hug you and kiss your gorgeous face and tell you how I feel about you, but I know you're a person who prefers to keep people at arm's length, and that's okay. I'm so horrified of being rejected by you that a freaking simulation of asking you out is enough to make me want to crawl in a hole. I know this is kind of rambly, and I'm sorry about that since I tend to ramble when I'm really, really nervous, but there you go. That's it," He concluded with another hefty sigh. "So, uh, like me please?"

Honey Lemon found that her jaw had dropped at some point during Tadashi's confession and was stood in solidarity with the rest of her face in an obstinate refusal to move. She truly had no idea about the depth of Tadashi's feelings for GoGo. "Well, that...was...good," The normally talkative Honey Lemon was at a loss for words. She looked to GoGo standing a few feet away to find that the color had been drained from her face and her expression was a combination of abject terror and extreme pain. Now was the time to act. "Oh, hey, GoGo. I didn't see you there." She waved to her friend.

"Uh, hey." She squeaked out, unable to meet Tadashi's gaze.

Honey Lemon took that as her signal to leave the two to discuss the whirlwind of emotions presently storming through their emotional system. "Well, I better go. This seems like something you two need to talk about." She hustled out of the door as Tadashi pleaded with her not to leave.

"Aiko, wai-" But she was already out of the room. Unknown to the two, she remained within the immediate proximity to the site of the recent revelation to reap the rewards of her genius. GoGo meticulously made her way over to Tadashi with her hands in her pockets. After several interminable seconds of awkward silence, Tadashi shattered the quiet with a deafening statement.

"I assume you heard that."

"Yep."

"How much?"

"All of it."

"Oh."

Honey Lemon thought the two more closely resembled shy schoolchildren than indefatigably confident college students perpetually equipped with an endless repertoire of snarky quips.

"Leiko, before you say anything, I just want you to know that I totally get if you aren't comfortable with being friends with me anymore." The anxiety in his voice was palpable.

"Hamada…"

"I mean, this is completely on me. I know you play things close to the chest, or the vest, or however that goes, and it was stupid of me to overstep my boundaries like that, especially with someone like you."

"Hamada."

"The only thing I ask is that you-"

"TADASHI!"

While GoGo was the one known for taking things at a pace somewhere between lighting and blazing fast, she yelled at Tadashi and grabbed him by the shoulders in order to stop his rambling. He looked at her like a lost puppy. "Can you shut up for two seconds, please?" GoGo couldn't help but smile as she saw Tadashi's face burn a bright crimson. With a deep breath, she continued. "I heard what you said, and I just wanted to say that I...didn't really dislike it all that much."

His face immediately perked up. "Really?"

"Well, it was really cheesy. Like, bargain-bin-at-the-dollar-store romance novel cheesy, but that's par for the course with you, you freaking dork."

Tadashi gave a slightly embarrassed grin. "Hey, I was only being honest," He paused for a moment as the two realized that GoGo still hadn't let go of his shoulders. A look of dread took over her face as she moved her arms away from him. To clear up any potential awkwardness, Tadashi intervened with a question on both of their minds. "So, would you wanna do something? With me, I mean."

"I guess I could consider it. I mean, I can't just give anyone the honor of doing stuff with me, you know. I am funny, sweet, smart, and beautiful, after all."

Honey Lemon couldn't suppress her exuberant grin as she made her way for the exit secure in the knowledge that Tadashi and GoGo were officially in love.


End file.
